[Regular patients] Surgery with lots of gain and loss
Decision for surgery
I wasn’t worried much about the surgery because I was taller than the average until 1st grade in middle school. But 1 year passed by and my friends who used to be shorter than me all grew taller, and when I entered high school, I became 2nd on the list. After that I was the number one in all grades. I was more interested in sports like skating and swimming than studying. But there were many times when I felt the limit in my body, which lead to disappointment. I had to finally accept my height and live that way. But around the time I was done with my military service, I learned that there was a surgery called Ilizarov and made up my mind to convince my parents for the surgery despite the high cost.
Entering the surgery
When I first did the surgery, I was very afraid. It even seemed stupid that I was letting my healthy bone be cut and letting doctors insert a nail into it, when other people have to do it because they are hurt and have no other choice. But the anticipation of being taller alone was enough for me to overcome everything. When I first returned to the ward after the surgery, I didn’t feel much pain. Just a little bit of pain in the level of discomfort… I was even thinking the painkiller is going wasted. But after that, training to walk with those pins inserted into my legs was painful. I felt as if I walking on a thorny field. I also had to experience the shame of excreting bodily wastes on the bed, since I couldn’t move around freely. Also because I was spending too much time on the bed, I fainted a few times during training. The doctor explained to me that happened because the heart was pumping up less blood and got used to it while I was resting on bed that the blood wasn’t pumping enough when I stood up. It didn’t feel good when I was fainting, but what was worse than that was the fact that someone had to be near me always in case I fainted again and fell, leading to a secondary complication. My condition was worse than other patients, so I was discharged 2 weeks later than other patients. I was able to endure with the hope of growing taller.
Complications and doubts
Towards the time I was discharged, I heard a lot of inflammation. I became closer people who had the same surgery, and talked about other patients who had to be re-operated because of inflammation. If inflammation occurs in the site of pin insertion, the vertically inserted pin has to be taken out and the patient has to live with horizontal pins. That means that the patient needs to live the external fixator until complete bone healing, which will delay going back to normal life. That’s when I started my battle against inflammation. I didn’t let anyone even talk toward the operated area, and wrapped the area several times when I was washing. If I felt something went in, I quickly disinfected the area. Having such lifestyle, I was becoming more and more short-tempered and I started taking out complaints and stress on my parents. On top of all the stress, bone healing was slow on my left foot, which made me doubt if I have to close up the increased gap. When people were lengthening the bone, I had to shorten it. Despite all the effort, bone healing wasn’t very sufficient, and the doctor said it would be better to graft artificial bone. I rather wasted a lot of time due to slow bone regeneration. I had to go through it for a longer time, and I think my legs are a bit bowed from stretching out my legs. Now anyone can tell that my legs are bowed in an X shape. The artificial bone graft was somewhat successful at first. It has been 3 years since the surgery and I think the bone has been filled up mostly and the intramedullary nail will be taken out soon. But by the 2nd year, only 10 % of the bone was filled up.
Words of request
There have been a lot of difficulties throughout the process. Not only was it physically difficult, but most importantly, mentally. I kept repeatedly doubting myself, what if the bone doesn’t grow fully, what if it never completely heals, what if I get inflammation… All these doubts led me to extreme stress, which made me let my anger to my parents, since I couldn’t go out to see other people. I was having so many conflicts with my parents that I think I had an argument with them at least twice a day. I felt like I was drifting away from the society because I couldn’t spending time with colleagues and needed to leave the event early if alcohol was involved. People know me as the guy who had problems with his leg, so I couldn’t join in any sports activities either. There definitely a lot of things I gained from the surgery, but also many things that I had to lose and give up.
[Regular patients] Surgery with lots of gain and loss
Decision for surgery
I wasn’t worried much about the surgery because I was taller than the average until 1st grade in middle school. But 1 year passed by and my friends who used to be shorter than me all grew taller, and when I entered high school, I became 2nd on the list. After that I was the number one in all grades. I was more interested in sports like skating and swimming than studying. But there were many times when I felt the limit in my body, which lead to disappointment. I had to finally accept my height and live that way. But around the time I was done with my military service, I learned that there was a surgery called Ilizarov and made up my mind to convince my parents for the surgery despite the high cost.
Entering the surgery
When I first did the surgery, I was very afraid. It even seemed stupid that I was letting my healthy bone be cut and letting doctors insert a nail into it, when other people have to do it because they are hurt and have no other choice. But the anticipation of being taller alone was enough for me to overcome everything. When I first returned to the ward after the surgery, I didn’t feel much pain. Just a little bit of pain in the level of discomfort… I was even thinking the painkiller is going wasted. But after that, training to walk with those pins inserted into my legs was painful. I felt as if I walking on a thorny field. I also had to experience the shame of excreting bodily wastes on the bed, since I couldn’t move around freely. Also because I was spending too much time on the bed, I fainted a few times during training. The doctor explained to me that happened because the heart was pumping up less blood and got used to it while I was resting on bed that the blood wasn’t pumping enough when I stood up. It didn’t feel good when I was fainting, but what was worse than that was the fact that someone had to be near me always in case I fainted again and fell, leading to a secondary complication. My condition was worse than other patients, so I was discharged 2 weeks later than other patients. I was able to endure with the hope of growing taller.
Complications and doubts
Towards the time I was discharged, I heard a lot of inflammation. I became closer people who had the same surgery, and talked about other patients who had to be re-operated because of inflammation. If inflammation occurs in the site of pin insertion, the vertically inserted pin has to be taken out and the patient has to live with horizontal pins. That means that the patient needs to live the external fixator until complete bone healing, which will delay going back to normal life. That’s when I started my battle against inflammation. I didn’t let anyone even talk toward the operated area, and wrapped the area several times when I was washing. If I felt something went in, I quickly disinfected the area. Having such lifestyle, I was becoming more and more short-tempered and I started taking out complaints and stress on my parents. On top of all the stress, bone healing was slow on my left foot, which made me doubt if I have to close up the increased gap. When people were lengthening the bone, I had to shorten it. Despite all the effort, bone healing wasn’t very sufficient, and the doctor said it would be better to graft artificial bone. I rather wasted a lot of time due to slow bone regeneration. I had to go through it for a longer time, and I think my legs are a bit bowed from stretching out my legs. Now anyone can tell that my legs are bowed in an X shape. The artificial bone graft was somewhat successful at first. It has been 3 years since the surgery and I think the bone has been filled up mostly and the intramedullary nail will be taken out soon. But by the 2nd year, only 10 % of the bone was filled up.
Words of request
There have been a lot of difficulties throughout the process. Not only was it physically difficult, but most importantly, mentally. I kept repeatedly doubting myself, what if the bone doesn’t grow fully, what if it never completely heals, what if I get inflammation… All these doubts led me to extreme stress, which made me let my anger to my parents, since I couldn’t go out to see other people. I was having so many conflicts with my parents that I think I had an argument with them at least twice a day. I felt like I was drifting away from the society because I couldn’t spending time with colleagues and needed to leave the event early if alcohol was involved. People know me as the guy who had problems with his leg, so I couldn’t join in any sports activities either. There definitely a lot of things I gained from the surgery, but also many things that I had to lose and give up.